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Dad was in the garage.“Dad,” Craig said, “the guys at school are using words I don’t understand.”“What words, son?” “Pussy and bitch. I asked Mom, but I don’t think she told me the right meanings.”“Son, never ask your mother about these things. Ask me. Let me explain what they mean for you.” He pulled a Playboy from his workbench, turned to the centrefold and drew a circle around the pubic area.“Everything inside the circle is pussy,” he said.“Okay, Dad. Then what’s a bitch?”“Everything outside the circle.”Private LessonsA husband and wife love to golf together, but neither of them are playing like they want to, so they decide to take private lessons. The husband has his lesson first. After the pro sees his swing, he says, “No no, no, you’re gripping the club way too hard!”“Well, what should I do?” asks the man.“Hold the club gently,” the pro replied, “just like you’d hold your wife’s breast.”The man takes the advice, takes a swing, and POW! He hits the ball 250 yds. straight up the. Walking down the street to the local grocer my boss had mentioned I walked in and found the clerk. "Hey Jim heard you got a hot milk-based story for me," I said resigned to my fate. Jim laughed coming around the counter to shake my hand "Hey Tim, yeah something like that, you got perfect timing we are just about to put another load out" he said waving me deeper inside the store. As we rounded the isle into the refrigerated section I saw a line of people packed in. "Wow, what are they waiting for?" I said confused. "They are here for the milk, watch we just got a delivery now," He said and I realized there might be more to this story than I had thought. As we watched a team of stockers carted the milk in front of the crowd, they didn't even bother to put it in the coolers. In moments it was all gone with some people walking away with cases of the stuff. "What the hell are they putting in that milk," I asked confused and Jim laughed again. "No clue, here come with me I think the owner.
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