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It surprised her completely; she just wasn't ready for it! We all laughed at her a she splashed in the water to regain her footing. Once on her feet she felt somewhat embarrassed, especially since she now noticed the two black gentlemen there and enjoying her embarrassment as much as I.Being a good sport and regaining her composure, Virginia joined the laughter. I now wanted to go down stream a short distance and around a sharp bend to fish a second hole which, in the past; I had some luck from time to time. She concurred and I was on my way! I entered the water and proceeded down river. Allen and Alex watched from the shore. I had no concern with the situation, i.e., Virginia being alone, especially with two strangers on the shore. Virginia and I kept a whistle as part of our safety gear so we could signal each other if there ever arose a problem. Besides I would be only a few hundred yards or so from her.Virginia had entered the water as I began the short journey down to the next. If the dates are correct this goes back weeks, months! It feels like my heart has stopped beating, and I am unable to breath. Why would she do such a thing to me ... to us ... to our family!Denial-Ok it is not that serious, obviously a mistake, an error of some sort. Maybe it is her sister, photoshop, a joke, some type of prank. I can only recall our good times. Were they ever real? Or is this an unconscious attempt by my mind to protect me from the pain of loss?Anger-We are told Anger is a common response when faced with significant decisions in which a person has little or no perceived input and will have a potentially negative effect. These circumstances often generate feelings of helplessness, which can fuel an individual's anger. But I was not prepared for the white hot anger that blotted out even my vision. A primal urge to kill, crush, destroy! Even thoughts of jail are forgotten, only the conscious decision of what will become of my children if I'm incarcerated keeps me from.
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