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I felt left to my own devices and with no one to talk to about how I was feeling. My husband had lost his father while he was a teenager. I think he just didn’t know that I needed his support. As a result, I felt abandoned and on my own when I most needed him. I had been carrying that resentment around with me for a long time and it affected our relationship in a negative way. Louise had a similar, but more tragic story. Her eldest son was a victim of suicide when he was eighteen, seven years ago. Her husband blamed Lou for it so she was not only left to grieve on her own but carried a lot of guilt around as well. She said that counselling helped her over the worst of the guilt but she felt abandoned by her husband when her need was greatest, similar to me. My husband complained about our sexual relationship all the time. The problem for me was that I didn’t feel the deep love for him that I once did. I felt that he just wanted sex for the sake of it. Louise told me she felt the same. " Why were you so interested in her boyfriends and what she got up to?" I suppose nosiness and jealousy of the young. Anyway I was furious at you for using Melanie and that was why the outburst in the Café. It was after we got home that I thought a bit about it. What Melanie does with her body was no concern of mine. I'm just a bit old-fashioned, and I was jealous for her getting a handsome man like you and I sit alone reading about women getting as much sex as they want and I who wanted it, got nothing." I'm sorry for you, by the way what do I call you, you know my name, what is yours." Betty, my friends call me Betty. I just wanted you here so I could apologise to you face to face. Sure you can see Melanie when she comes home at the weekends. That was another lie I told you," she started crying now.I put my arm around her and pulled her to my chest. "Betty why do you dress in black?" I like black and surprising as you may think it deters attention. Oh I want attention, but I am also.
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