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I was wrong about a lot of things, and I know that now. I’m not just desperate. Which of course implies that I am also desperate, which I am. I am desperate to be able to sleep again. I know that, and I still believe I am making the right decision. Being aware of our biases helps us to mitigate their effects. I’m not just desperate. I do love him, and I was wrong. I was wrong about a lot of things. Kazaharu-san was right that I had been unwilling to make a decision between career and family. Lots of women juggle both, even with children, but fundamentally one or the other has to come first. For me it has always been career, without question, any day of the week and twice on Sunday. I think today is Sunday. Between practicing law and entertaining, career easily devoured almost all of me. I suppose I had two careers. I suppose they did have all of me. This is his building. The elevator code is still the same as it was years ago. My decision is not which will come first. I have to give. The heat was too hot to withstand, and this caused me to wake up. My t shirt and shorts were stuck to my body and I could feel little beads of sweat dripping down my forehead. I was incredibly thirsty, so I crept quietly out of Louisa's bedroom and downstairs into the kitchen. I stood by the sink and poured out myself a glass of water. I slowly gulped it down, the cold water slipping down my throat felt satisfyingly good. As I went to pour myself out another drink I heard a loud thud behind me, causing me to jump. I turned around to see Mr. Patterson standing by the doorway with a briefcase by his foot and his arms stretched out. I walked over to him and we embraced. "Jenna, it's so good to see you again. My God, you're growing up fast," he said, still holding me. "It's good to see you too Mr Patterson," I blushed. We both broke away from our embrace and stared at each other. "Where's Louisa?" he asked. "And why are you down here alone so late?" "She's upstairs fast asleep, and I.
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