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" So you decided to quit? Go into rehab?" No. When the other EMTs came in with the stretcher and other gear I was up and around ... lucid. Laura covered for me -- told them I was okay and that I didn't need any more attention. They started taking the equipment back to the truck. Laura stayed behind ... she gave me her card. Laura is a nurse who's also a volunteer EMT. She told me she lost a niece to an overdose ... and that I looked like her. She told me there was no need to involve the authorities -- this time -- and that I should call her and set up an appointment ... otherwise, next time she would call the cops." You called her?"Cindy nodded. "She took me in ... offered her home to me ... and with her help I got clean going cold turkey." So that's how you were able to give me the support you did when I went off the oxy -- you went through it, too. You knew what it felt like." I don't want to diminish what you went through, Nick ... but I can assure you that what I experienced was. And looking at my mom, her friends, and especially Margie in a completely different light. I took a new interest in how shirts fell over breasts, how jeans and shorts hugged asses, bangs hung around cheeks and eyes. There was no denying that I was now interested in girls. Only a week or two after that night, witnessing Margie and my mom, my desire for women was in full flame. The funny thing is that I was deathly afraid of what my mom would think. Although she herself was a lesbian, her parents didn’t know and it was something that she didn’t tell anyone. It was a total secret. She talked to me and Sara about finding boys, marrying, having k**s, stuff like that, but never gave us any clue that she was a closet lesbian. I know she would never have wanted her parents to find out, and she was someone who cared a lot about appearances and what others thought. I’m pretty sure that she would be worried if she found out that I liked girls. So it was important that my interest stay my.
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