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I wilt beneath the intensity of his gaze, looking away. My mother sat demurely next to me in a dark jilbab and a colorful shaylah covering her head. She was a proper Muslim woman. Unlike me.I felt the tears running down my eyes as I shamefully remembered how amazing being with Lucy had been. Why couldn't I have just died? It would have been so much easier than having to live with this crushing guilt and the hatred burning in my father's eyes."That girl was here," my father barked in Arabic. "That whorish girl you shamed yourself with!" I am sorry, Father," I said respectfully. "I was weak and—" Weak!" he roared. "You were her fucking whore! Now I know why you refused to date all those boys! You fucking lesbian! Do you know how much shame you have brought on your family?" I..."Father just kept on yelling, not letting me get a word in. "If we were back in Lebanon, I would slit your whorish throat!"An honor killing. I swallowed, fear gripping my heart. Why, oh why did I have to live? I. It is nothing more sinister than that,”‎‎”If you say so,” I was a little peeved. After all she had broken into my house and snooped around. She probably would deny it but I was sure she had a good look around while she waited. Fortunately there was nothing for her to fine. I had cleaned the place out a long time ago.‎After a few awkward seconds she asked, “Since I’m already here, would you like to have dinner out somewhere or not?”‎‎”‎Sure we can go to dinner if you like,” I suggested. My tone must have given it away.‎‎”You sound less than enthusiastic. I think I should just go home,” she said.‎‎”Okay,” I replied. I for sure wasn’t ready to let her off the hook for just showing up.‎‎”Okay,” she said walking out the door. I watched her all the way to her car.‎Something gnawed at me all evening. Since I had been paranoid ever since leaving the JOB, I had long ago purchased a bug sweeper. Those things came from five bucks to five hundred and more. The one I had chosen was well under a.
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