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I didn't have the sexual experience of her "wonderful lover," who "took her to heights my husband has still never achieved." She also didn't mention that, with me, she always changed in a locked bathroom. She didn't mention that we've still never made love with the lights on. She didn't mention that until she 'let' me go down on her, that first time, she had always insisted that oral sex was "too dirty." She somehow failed to mention that she never once, in our twenty-five years of marriage, provided oral sex for me.I'll never forget that first oral sex, the one in which she detailed my shortcomings in her story. It was the only time she laughed and giggled during sex. Somehow she didn't mention that she made fun of my efforts at the time. What a joke, I wasn't just wearing horns, I was cleaning a very fresh load of her lover out of her. I wonder if she has any idea how it makes me feel to know that she didn't think it was 'too dirty' for me go down on her when she was full of her. You even watch us begin to have sex together. How do you feel?”Sue said, “I know I’m not supposed to feel jealous, but I probably will.”Dave nodded, “You’ll have to substitute compersion for that response. In other words, you have to unlearn the automatic response to be jealous. It’s something the newer members of the Circle work on for their first year or so. No one, me included, will be going out of their way to slight you or rub your nose in not being chosen. There’s a lot more demand to be with other people than there is supply. We can’t be all things to all people in a physical way. You have to believe that your turn will come, and in the meanwhile become satisfied with someone else that is free.”Sue digested that. “I know about compersion because you talked about it two nights ago. Any hints about how to shed my automatic response to situations like you outlined?”Dave said, “I think it helps to talk about the scenarios ahead of time with somebody else. When Alice, my only wife.
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