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Hairy made the mental leap to determining that the snake was somehow communicating to him, and that it had a purpose. He decided to hear it out. ‘My name is Hard Kock,’ the snake said. ‘Your father, Big Pecker, and I were bessst friendsss at Froggwantsss Conssservatory. Your mother, Sssucca Bigwan, was probably the best sssorcsseressss I ever met.’ Hairy’s mind was reeling. What the hell is Froggwants Conservatory and what did he mean his mom was a sorceress? ‘It’s why I reached out to you Hairy,’ the snake continued. ‘You are the only person who can help me.’ Hairy felt stupid talking to a snake. ‘What can I do?’ Hairy asked as he turned to look down the corridor at the zookeeper to see if she thought he was crazy talking to the snake enclosure. The young woman seemed oblivious to Hairy. ‘I’m trapped in here,’ the snake went on. ‘The cage is warded to prevent my essscape. You, Hairy. You have the power to ssset me free.’ Hairy decided to humor the snake. He was beginning to wonder. They got to hear something, even if it's their own mouth running. I wait on people a lot, and I learn a lot from it.But time passed, and she kept gaping at me; and I come to understand she's playin' the game too. So I says, and not unkindly, "So, talk to me."I just wanna get her going again, you know?"Well ... in my story," she's now biting on her lower lip, "err, of course, I won't use your name. I ... err..." I let her consult wit her notes because I know reporters need to have they notes so they can quote you correctly later on."Well, the fact of the matter is that your cooperation would be very much appreciated, Mr. Liston. Oh, and I'll pay you for your services." Like a Ho?" I said, right in her face. I know I showered her with some of my spittle, but I didn't mean too, and that shook her up. Bitch almost fell out of the chair."No, no, no, no. I'm asking you as one who is an authority on whores." How much green we talkin' about?" I asked in a more reasonable tone, as I like to.
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