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“Ever come close to getting married?” she asked after we sat down.“No, not really. A couple of long-term relationships that eventually flamed out...”“Your fault of hers?”“Probably an equal share of both.”“How did you get better looking?”“Genetics, or so I am led to believe. I think it has something to do with the painting in the closet, myself.”“Oh, is that where you are keeping it? Good to know.”“So you were not adventurous enough for him? You mellow in your later years? I seem to remember you being pretty outgoing. And that was before we had sex outside.”“That was fun wasn’t it. He was not interested, although I did strip a couple of times in public. He was more of the it should stay in the bedroom, or occasionally the living room, kind of adventurous.”“Sounds dull. Kids?”“No, no kids, and it was. I should have been suspicious when he asked to have a threesome with another woman, but I have just never been that interested in sex with another woman. Now another man, that sounds like. ” Andy was scribbling notes as fast as I was talking, so I just kept going.“A cop who’s out on the night beat hears the yelling. The girl comes running past him and he turns his back on the parking garage to go to her aid. He calls for back-up because he isn’t going into that parking garage alone. Besides which, there’s a beautiful girl running naked down the street. That’s got his attention. Meanwhile, the muggers have what they want—except for the girl, but you can’t have it all—so they take off and our rich dude who wants to be on the council watches his Lexus drive off while he’s lying there naked and bleeding. This homeless drunk comes along and sees him, plops down beside him and offers him a drink from his bottle, which the dude gladly accepts because he’s in frickin’ pain. When the EMTs get there, so does a reporter who snaps a picture of the would-be councilman lying naked in the arms of a homeless drunk. That hits the front page of the morning paper.” I was having a blast.
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