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“It’s not what you think!” I called back. That sounded lame even to me. “Ms. Baines is my administrative assistant and she usually brings coffee in to encourage me to get up. And she doesn’t stand there staring at me when I do. She brings the coffee, yells at me to get my lazy ass out of bed, and leaves.”“All right. I need to have a talk with this administrative assistant. Bringing you coffee is one thing, but yelling at you to get your lazy ass out of bed is strictly a wife’s prerogative. When and why does she get here on Saturday?”“Saturday? It’s Saturday? She doesn’t come in on Saturday. What am I doing out of bed?” Elizabeth had begun undressing on the other side of the big bed.“I don’t know. I expected you to be in bed when I got undressed.” I jumped back in bed and Elizabeth handed me the coffee while she continued disrobing. I took a long sip as my wife was slowly revealed after ten long days away.“Not that I’m complaining, but why are you here?”“I’m here to do serious damage. Tequila…and coffee?”“Oh.” Her shoulder lifts. Her flush darkens. “I have a tendency to get distracted when I go out. Forget about my drink.” She points to the clearly watered-down drink she’d returned to the barman. “So instead of spending money on something alcoholic that I’ll only have half of, I order something non-alcoholic. But I still want alcohol because why on earth not, so I have a shooter as well.”“And what could be so distracting that you forget about a perfectly good drink?” you ask, curious.“People.” Your brow furrows in query and she rushes to explain. “I people-watch. All the time. People fascinate me. How they interact, talk, their mannerisms, funny little quirks. How they communicate when they don’t say a word. You can tell a lot about a person from those things. Their mood, how they feel about someone…a lot really. So I people-watch.”She falls silent, stirring sugar into her coffee. Her flush has darkened again and you wonder why she would be embarrassed by the.
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