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That a big part of her was beating herself up and feeling overwhelmed with guilt at the thoughts and feelings that had entered her mind since our twins, Abigail and Sarah, had turned eighteen and headed off to college. Leaving us well and truly empty nesters, as our son John had headed off to college the preceding fall.My own thoughts and feelings might have been a veritable swirling vortex of confusion, but at that moment my single thought was to comfort the woman I loved, and let her know I didn’t think less of her in any way for the confession she’d just made or the thoughts she was having.“Jill, honey. Don’t be silly. Of course, I don’t think you’re a terrible woman for having such thoughts. You’re only flesh and blood. It’s only human to sometimes wonder about these things. To wonder about what it would be like with someone else. And anyway, I’m hardly going to be the one to condemn you, when I’ve been having similar thoughts myself. How would that work then? I’d have to tattoo. It was a Saturday afternoon and we were sitting on theback deck with a bottle of wine."When does school start Gretchen?" A week from Tuesday and you know that," I said. "The date is circled onthe calendar in the kitchen.'"Yes I know," he sighed. "But that also raises a question?" I know and I have still have questions as to how," I said."Anything is possible if you want it enough Honey and I think we bothwant it," he said."We do but ..." No buts Gretchen, just let me handle it," he smiled as he placed hishand on mine. "You trust me don't you?" You know I do," I smiled."Good then its settled," he smiled.I turned in my letter of resignation the first day of school. I offeredto stay until they could find a replacement but they say I was not neededanymore. I suppose in a way it was a bit of a letdown being told you wereneeded but by that weekend I had donated away pretty much everything thatwasn't Gretchen's and had moved into my new home with Rob.The first few months were like heaven..
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