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” The lady says over her shoulder at you and you frown.“Isn’t that a woman’s costume?” You ask. She waves a hand as she shifts through the costumes on the rack.“Think of how funny it would be, I would bet you could win a contest if you went as Bo Peep.” She says.You think it odd that she mentioned a contest since the cover charge for the party was twenty bucks which went into a pot for the best costume. “But wouldn’t I need…um…breasts to be Bo Peep?” You say, almost embarrassed to say breasts in front of this elderly lady. She turns and holds up a short dress with a frilly lacy lining and a plunging neck line. She then rifles through a shelf and presents you with a pair of white stockings and a pair of white four inch heel clogs. You take the proffered items purely on instinct as she shoves them into your hands.“No, it’ll be a gag costume son, don’t you get it?” She says and leads you to the wigs, selecting a blonde wig with two long golden ponytails hanging down for you. This is. And when you mix in sweaty sex that just brings back memories of the Havendale Drive-In and watching Hellbound: Hellraiser 2, kind of sort of, from the backseat of a ‘76 Mustang.I could not help but pick up the box and read. Yes it was slightly intriguing. The description on the package included things like, …“dual action lubricant”… and …“warming and tingling sensations for both partners”… and …“uniquely shaped condom design”. There were also promises that these condoms, which are lubricated on both sides …“provide thrilling sensations of pleasure for both partners”… and it …“brings more passion and excitement.”I just had to scratch my head, especially over the last part. More passion and excitement? Not sure about how Trojan Man feels, but a condom has never helped bring me more passion and excitement. What, in the past, a rubber always used to bring was that sense of relief that I was not getting Chlamydia or herpes from the half lit skank I hooked up with at La.
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