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"Begging your pardon sah," I said, "If you don't make Miss Drace an offer I shall shoot off your bollocks one by one before I put your appendage in a mangle and flatten it sah, begging your indulgence sah." What?" he asked uncredulously."Bollocks sah," I explained, "Easily removed, but a bugger to sew back on." Are you threatening me Sergeant?" he asked."Yes sah, good day sah!" I said and I took a step towards the door and showed the gun, whereupon he crashed to the floor senseless in a complete funk.Cowdray was made of different stuff and I am sure he fouled his breeches when I threatened his appendage at point blank range."You're mad Sergeant." he said, "Quite mad!" Bloody livid sah!" I said. "If you'll excuse me sah, make an offer sah, not much future for officers with no balls if you get my meaning sah!" I'll have you court martialled!" he said, "Insolence." Make you a laughing stock sah, I don't think so sah," I said. "I could always shoot one off now as a warning sah?" Just get. "I can do anything and everything Mere Aaka (My master)," I said."Mere Aaka? That is nice. Who am I speaking to?" she said laughing again."I am the Genie of this telephone," I told her not wanting to disclose my identity as yet."Tell me all you can do, My Genie," she said imperiously."I can press your feet. I can polish your boots Mere Aaka," I said."Not interested. Continue," she commanded."I can wash your clothes. I can iron them for you, Mere Aaka," I said."No, I have a dhobi (washerman) who does that. Go on," she said."I can drive you round the city. I can give you a conducted tour of all the historical sites in town, Mere Aaka," I continued."No thank you, I get enough of history in college. What else?" she wanted know."I can cook for you, Mere Aaka," I suggested."Interesting, what can you cook?" she asked."I can boil water for starters, Mere Aaka," I said.She laughed and said, "Boil water? Some cook. Hot water is good for bathing only. Not interested. Tell me more." I can escort.
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