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I love her," he said."Okay, I'll just shoot you both," said my dad. He pulled the trigger and all we could hear was a loud bang. About a second after the shot Danny realized that he could still move and launched himself at my dad. My dad reached out and put his hand on Danny's forehead, laughing his ass off as Danny tried over and over again to swing at him."Danny, calm down. It was just a joke," he laughed. Danny looked up at him in confusion."How do you know my name?" he asked."Uh, you ruined my Christmas," said my dad. "The whole time she was home, she talked about you constantly. If she wasn't talking about you, she was texting you, or on the phone with you. Jeezus it was almost as if you were there with us. I came up here to get her mother's pie plate. So when I saw the two of you, I just had to yank your chain a little." But you shot me?" said Danny."It's just a big cap pistol," said my dad. "I use it for starting my track team's races back home. It scared the shit out of you. "At this point I shut down the computer, grab a drink and then crawl into bed naked. She should be home soon.The third type is a more hard-core jerk fest. I do this when no one is home and I know that no one is coming home. Wifey is away, etc. I spread a towel on the sofa and stack all of my favorite porn DVD's on the end table. I also put out a roll of papertowel and some hand lotion. I then put in a DVD. I like gangbang, fuck-my-wife, and creampie vids the best. I also like to watch big, white cocks in action. Sometimes a black one is nice, too.I try not to cum too quick so I can enjoy as many DVDs or VHS tapes as I can. When I do cum I have three pieces of papertowel at the ready. I might be a small dicked cuck but I have big balls and I cum like Peter North (we're from the same area so maybe it's the water). Two pieces of papertowel will get soaked and I will have a mess but three will contain it. I can't let it just spray or I'll have to wash the walls. As with most guys, I don't.
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