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I was trown into one ditch and Bessie was trown into da udder. By Jaysus I was hurt, very bad like, and didn’t want to move. However, I could hear old Bessie moanin’ and groanin’. I knew she was in terrible pain just by her groans.Shortly after da accident, a policeman on a motorbike turned up. He could hear Bessie moanin’ and groanin’ too, so he went over to her. After he looked at her, and saw her condition, he took out his gun and shot her between the eyes.Den da policeman came across de road, gun still in hand, looked at me, and said, ‘Mr. Drover, how are you feelin’?’... ‘Now yer honor, wot da fock would you say?’“Beer Stories”Three friends are sitting around their favorite pub. The first guy says “Hey guys, I know this other bar where you go in and every third drink that you order, you get the next one free. On top of t hat, about 1/4 of the time I go in there, I get lucky!” The second guy says, “That’s nothing! I know this bar where you get every other drink on the house, and. I just need to talk to someone about keeping their big mouth shut!”“May I make a suggestion?” Dad asked.“Sure.”“Talk to Mom One. If the issue is what I think it is, she might be able to help you explain.”“You mean about what Mom One and Melanie did?”“Yes, but also about the trouble it caused for all of us. Do I need to talk to Libby’s parents?”“That’s why I’m here. Mom Two said it was probably better if you called to talk to her parents.”“Why?”I shrugged, “She didn’t say. Here’s the number.”“OK. I’ll call and make sure. Go talk to Mom One.”I left Dad’s study and headed back to the coach house. I found Mom One in the basement doing laundry.“Dad said I should talk to you about Cynthia.”“Cynthia?”“She blabbed about all the stuff she and I did together to Missy, Sally, and Heather, and one of them told Kelly about it.”“Ah,” Mom One said with a knowing look. “Now I think I understand more about what happened.”“Why didn’t you ask?”“Because your relationships have to be as private as you.
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