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Although in some ways Max is an ideal housemate – no arguments over who didn’t add ‘mayonnaise’ to the grocery list, no cries of ‘you gross pig!’ over me gulping milk straight from the carton (only joking, Mom!, I’d NEVER do that... ), no fights over which TV channel we’re watching, no competition for the bathroom when I’m in a hurry – he does lack a few social attributes.He accepts my world view unblinkingly, without comment, but at times it might be a nice change to have a conversation with two of us participating and discussing, rather than it feeling a little like I’m talking to myself. Although it feels good to be running my fingers through his fur when I need some companionship, he seems to have perpetual morning breath, and you really don’t want him kissing you. No, he’s not the complete package in a live-in partner. Still better company and more loyal than Marsha was – though she was a lot more fun in bed sometimes when we weren’t fighting – but not exactly the summit of my. And then I walked over to the woman and stopped right in front of her and she looked up at me and then Lucy answered and it was a selfie of her in her bed and she had her arm around her unicorn and the unicorn was staring right at me and Lucy was kissing it and the text under the picture said 'Sorry, I'm taken' and I could tell she didn't have any clothes on or at least she was topless because I could see most of her tits and I sent her a crying face.And I put the phone away and the woman was still looking up at me not saying anything like she was just waiting for me to say something and I thought 'Do it! Say it!' and I said “I want you to suck on my tits” and her face went bright red and that was it. Her expression didn't change one bit and she didn't even blink or flinch, her face just changed color and then she said “Okay” like it was nothing.I opened my jacket and pulled my shirt and my bra up as far as they would go and now I was standing there in front of her with my tits out.
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