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I particularly get turned on by boyishlooking girls but now I'm a feminine looking girl myself I know thereisn't anything I can do about pleasing them so that can feelfrustrating. Of course it's easier to make female friends than before mytransition but that is as far as it ever goes. I do enjoy the physicalcontact of hugs with other women but often wish we could dwell thesehugs for longer.So as far as other girls are concerned, I'm just another shy bigbreasted girl. I've never met any gay ladies but I would love to do someexperimenting. There's a part of me, deep down inside, that still feelslike a guy, and often being with a girl at lunch or out shopping bringsthat out. Before my breast surgery that used to happen when I went tostep aerobics at the gym. My problem in my mind is I'm not equipped todo anything about a relationship with a woman it and wont change in thefuture so there is no point in worrying about it. When I decided to goahead with the change, I sure didn't expect it. Marie smiled and said, "It isn't your fault. And you're right, it would be nice to have a place like this in town. Of course we don't want to be here and there are far too many nights that we don't get to sleep alone."She saw my confused expression and explained, "The judge lets his friends stay over a lot."I whispered, "I'm sorry. I guess I never was very bright. Look how I ended up!"Marie hugged me and said, "Don't let it get you down. We have gotten used to it. We just try not to think about it and concentrate on how many days we have left."She turned the water on in the shower and while it got steamy she handed me a spare toothbrush and some toothpaste. Before I started brushing my teeth I asked, "Do you mind if I ask a personal question that is none of my business?"Susan smiled and said, "How did we end up here?"I nodded.She explained, "They were going to take my daughter away from me because of a lawsuit my ex-husband filed. The judge took me into his chambers and told me that.
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