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For some reason, perhaps not unconnected with a secret visit to the doctor, there was no brother or sister for Nicola in the first few years. After that the few physical attractions Gwennie had had to offer were lost in a mountain of fat induced by regular large doses of fish and chips, or the Cardiff speciality, curry with half-and-half (half rice, half chips). Sex was a rare activity in the household and nobody really missed it; Gwennie because she was too fat to enjoy it, and Nathan because he found her obesity rather off-putting. As he remarked to a work-mate on one occasion, “I’d need a step ladder to get on top of her.”Nicola was twelve and had been getting glowing school reports for some time when Nathan was coming home from the pub drunk, and walked under a bus. “He stepped straight out without looking,” said an eye-witness, and there was Gwennie, thirty-one years old and widowed with a child still at school.Times became hard for the mother and daughter, and Gwennie lost. P. Wells’, or at least most of it. He asked for my Texas Driver’s License and actually examined it closely (another sure sign that he was really FBI), then he grabbed my one carry-on bag and we were soon driving off towards downtown in a large black SUV that couldn’t have screamed ‘Government’ more if it tried. The driver, an Agent whose name I was apparently not worthy enough to receive, answered all of my numerous questions promptly with, ‘I don’t know Sir,’ ‘I don’t have that information, Sir’ or ‘I can’t divulge that information at this time, Sir.’ Exasperated I asked him how long he had been sleeping with his boss’s wife? To which I got the more candid reply, ‘That I could tell you Sir, but then I’d have to kill you.’ Who says FBI agents have no sense of humor! We got checked into a nice downtown 3 or 4 star hotel and I was hustled up to my room without ever having to sign in, nor did I in fact actually ever receive a room key from anyone for several days. Swell. The party in.
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