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I felt rather heroic. I had become attached to the hill I'd conquered over the past six months and to the bloated carrier bags that I now slung around my back and shoulders with routine nonchalance. I had not grown taller, but from the way I was climbing that hill every day and the way I handled multiple deliveries on the big hill at the top of Exchange Street on Saturdays, I had grown in strength and endurance. I felt I had learned the message behind Pogo's little joke, which I had seen not long ago in the Sunday comics: "We have met the enemy, and he is us!" My physical limitations were my major enemy. I felt that if I could not overcome them, then I must develop effective workarounds.Adults were, if not inimical, untrustworthy at best. My peers and those who were slightly older had gone Brando, all in upturned collars or black motorcycle jackets and t-shirts. Boys my own age, nearly fourteen, began outpacing me physically; I watched them grow taller, while I stayed where I was. I. .. whom?The desire to feel a heavy virile body on top of me runs through me like wildfire. I'm not even trying to block the possibility of the said body to be my father's."Dad?" I start hesitantly, unsure how to phrase my curiosity. "What do boys feel when they want to have sex?" I whisper.I know what I feel. Hope he's not going to ask me that. I just wanna know if I was mean with Mark to get him all worked up and not have sex with him. It just didn't feel right. He didn't care enough about me. I didn't want him enough. I don't know why, but it just wasn't right.- JamesShe agrees to the movie but she seems distracted. I pop the tape in and we watch for a bit. Suddenly she speaks up. "Dad? What do boys feel when they want to have sex?" The question comes out in a low voice that I can barely hear over the TV.I tense up a little bit and look over to Anna. She looks nervous. I exhale a bit and try to collect my thoughts. She's growing up so fast. It is only fair to let her know as much as.
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