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After my husband’s death, Mr. R noticed that although I was doing better much of the time, especially when working in the boutique, I still had periods of profound loss and struggle. He also noticed that I was probably struggling with the submissive part of me not being fulfilled. Through our relationship he understood what we had in our relationship. It was obviously something we were very careful to keep from John. Being away to college helped. During this time he experimented with me and notice my change when he took control, not sexually, he wouldn’t do that to his wife. But he also notice that after John moved back from college after graduation, and started helping me at the boutique, that I seemed better for more of the time. John was showing the ability to call me on my behavior and pull me out of my funks by directing me, but he was still dealing with his mom. Rodriguez finally took John aside and told him what he had to do, take control of me. He took the chance to explain. I wanted to put them on ? I wanted it so bad I could taste it? but I couldn't. Not until I talked to Dad.The next five days were the longest of my life. I didn't leave thehouse, just stayed inside and sat in front of the computer, doingresearch. Karen Sinclair had vanished two years ago, I learned. No onehad ever been charged; as far as the police were concerned she was amissing person, not a murder victim. Maxwell Sinclair was still legallymarried to her. John, whose last name was Richardsen, had died last yearof a drug overdose. No word of the affair had ever made it to thepapers.God. What had I gotten myself into?When my parents got home I think they were shocked by how happy I was tosee them.***Dad, to his credit, took the news a lot more calmly than I'd expected. Itold him everything ? even the dressing and the sexual urges. We were in what he called his 'office,' a small study off of the garagewhere he kept his technical manuals and drafting board and whatnot. Ithad been over a.
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