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At the moment I kinda wished the gun was real. I’m still not sure if a fake is worth the trouble. You gotta have big balls to bluff your way with a fake. Luckily, I have big balls, for a girl.“Guys, it’s a fake. We can take her,” he said, growing more insistent.Anyway, other than try and fight him, which I knew I couldn’t win, I’d do better to just run out the door behind me. “Are you so sure you wanna be shot in the face, motherfucker?” I asked him. I had the gun back on the chief by now. The other boys were frozen, staring at me like rabbits in a headlight.“Listen, you dumb fucks,” I finally said, exasperated. “We made a deal, and we’re stickin’ to it. I’m not ripping you off or anything. This is all your doing. If you’d been straight with me, you’d never know I had a gun.”“I still don’t believe you. It’s a fake,” the chief said, and I could see him tensing. I knew he was just a second away from coming at me. Holding the gun directly in his face, I yelled “Bang!” just as loud as I. Map Quest or Google Maps really need to start their directions on # 5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.8. Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.9. I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.10. Bad decisions make good stories.11. You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.12. Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blu-Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection ... again.13. I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page technical report that I swear I did not make any changes to.14. I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.15. I think the freezer deserves a light as well.16. I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night.
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