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“That’s to massage the St. Bernards, they have thick hair,” I said, shaking my head as she continued farther into the dungeon.“Honey is that a dentist’s chair? Are you studying to be a dentist?” she asked.Huh?“Yes, sure Mom, do-it-yourself dentistry is the latest rage!” I lied.“Jesus is missing from that cross, Steve-O,” she chastised.“He’s out preaching, Mom!” I said, exasperated.“There’s my sleep mask!” she chirped. “Why didn’t you tell me you had it?”“I told you all of this yesterday, Mom, but you forgot!” I said, trying to direct her back toward the exit.“Oh look, Steve-O, that nice policeman left his handcuffs here the other day!”Nice policeman? What the hell was she talking about?“Nope, those are mine. They’re for my new job,” I said as I had her almost to the door.“Why does that Ping Pong paddle say SLUT on it?” she asked.“It’s the dog’s name, come on Mom, let’s get you back in the living-room!” I said, my patience worn thin.“That’s not a very nice name for a dog, Steve-O!” she. I put on the coffee in the small barn office and went out to give Chester a hand. He was a good kid from Montrose, Colorado who had spent most of his short life on his family's ranch. He grinned when he saw me take the wheel barrow full of hay and manure and head for the barn door. I quickly walked a short distance and dumped it on the ground. We’ll spread it in the pastures later when the weather turns. I returned to the barn and leaned on a stall door as Chester continued to clean stalls. “So?” I asked. “How was the big date?” “Oh, pretty good, I guess” he said, with a little question in his answer. He told me about them going out for a simple dinner, going to the movies and then to her parents' house. “Rob, you’re my friend and can keep a secret, right?” Chester queried me. “Yep, Chester, I can keep my mouth shut.” He started, “I’m not sure how to tell you about this so I’ll just flat-out say it. Last night after Kristen and I had finished making.
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